Amanda Kern

“It is foolish and wrong to mourn the men who died. Rather we should thank God that such men lived.” -George S. Patton, Jr.

Since September I’ve been anxiously awaiting to meet this special little guy.  I think you all will enjoy finally meeting the son of the late Coach Wenstrom, here’s 2 week old JC.

In early September I learned of Coach Wenstrom’s passing and was very touched hearing how many lives he touched and that he left behind his wife, Melissa, and a new son on the way. I’ve learned that Coach Wenstrom was admired by many and was such a selfless man who influenced the lives of many kids over the years. I managed to get in touch with his wife and let her know I wanted to give my photography to her family knowing that they would cherish the moments I’d capture. I know there’s not much I can do to heal the hurt felt since his passing, but perhaps in seeing these first moments with his son will help remind others of just how much good he has brought to the world. I’m sure he’s had many great accomplishments in his life, but I think we all agree that little JC is his greatest.

Though I never knew Coach Wenstrom, I did see the one photo that was used in his memorial online and found JC to resemble his father. I bet those that knew Coach Wenstrom would agree.

I was thankful that Erin McLain was willing to stop by to give me a hand with this session. Though I’ve done most of my photo sessions on my own, I have to admit that with newborn photography it’s great to have an extra helping hand to help in posing the little ones. JC was such a strong alert little guy so we tried positioning him in one of the more challenging poses for newborns.

He did amazing considering how squirmy he was! He even held his head up high all on his own!

JC was an active little guy, but he settled down quite a bit once we swaddled him. He seemed so full of thought and was such a mellow little guy.

Of course I can’t help but capture tiny features like his perfect little lips and feet.

Yes, he’s such a perfect little guy.

I can only imagine the emotions Melissa must be going through to have lost her husband during her pregnancy. While we were tending to JC’s needs she took a moment to share a photo and told me about her husband. I admit it put chills down my spine to realize how suddenly her husband was taken from her, yet somehow God managed to find a way to make sure she was blessed with this little miracle. I imagine every time she looks at her little blessing she will continue to be reminded of an amazing man who touched the lives of so many. For me it’s just a constant reminder that we all should take the time now to take the time to let loved ones in our lives know just how special they are because we don’t always have control over what tomorrow holds.

JC is definitely one of the most special little ones I’ve photographed in the last 2+ years that I’ve been doing newborn photography.

One of the things I love most about newborn photography is that sometimes you can begin to see a little piece of who this little person will become someday. Something tells me Coach Wenstrom will always be a big part of this little guy’s life. Just look at how thoughtful this little guy is, I know someday he’ll get to hear all the stories of what an amazing man his father was.

Melissa I hope your family and friends enjoy the photos of little JC. He was such a precious little guy. I have no doubt your husband is looking down  on you both proudly. Hold this little guy tight, and always remember his father’s memory will always live on through him. Best wishes to you and your family raising this little guy – you’ve definitely been blessed with a little miracle.

“Kindness is the only service that will stand the storm of life and not wash out.”
-Abraham Lincoln

I thought I’d take a moment to update you all as I gear up for the last 9 days of course work towards my masters in the winter quarter at SCAD and the final week before Valencia’s spring break. I finally see a little bit of a break ahead, but I know the next week will be insanely busy for me. I often write updates in my twitter account and as I stay busy this next week and I hope you all aren’t too shocked to hear my latest update:

After learning I miscarried exactly four months ago I never would have believed you if you told me I would hurt more today then I did then. But I do. And though it’s not necessary to explain the hurt that has come to exceed that pain I felt back then I am not ashamed to speak up and say that my heart aches so much more today. Those that have lost someone or something in their life that was meaningful understand how trying the journey can be to healing a heart that aches. You never forget no matter how hard you try. I suppose I’ve come to take a lot for granted that now has come to make me a little more emotional than I have been in months.

Over the last few months I’ve been so touched by those of you who reached out to show your sincere care and everytime I find myself emotional the words posted by one of my colleagues, Angelique Smith, posted on my blog four months ago continue to echo through my mind:

“There is healing in tears and allowing yourself this time to grieve. Cry like pouring rain when sadness takes you over. Instead of straining to keep a facade of peace, Cry alone until tears run dry… Cry, cry and cry… Tears are there to protect your heart. When tears finally run dry, your heart will be calm and quiet. Feeling clear inside, You will be left with the transpicuous sense of being blessed with life. So, look for beautiful things around you, And you will find a hope, a hope to move on and remember that you are blessed.”

Amidst the busy and emotional moments I find I do what I do best. I reflect. No matter how much hurt surrounds me I realize just how much good I have done just since October. I found myself up early this morning doing just that. It’s not uncommon that I find myself busier as I cope with emotions, it is what keeps me going. Reflecting this morning helped me realize:

• Just since my recovery in October I have done 24 photoshoots. 20 of those came before the end of 2009.
• I have photographed a total of 10 newborns since late October. 8 of those came in a two week span after I recovered physically from the chaotic month of October.

• I volunteered and was accepted as a photographer with Now I Lay me Down to sleep. Just since being approved as a volunteer photographer in December 2009 I have photographed 7 babies who passed away. It’s something I always hesitated to volunteer to do before miscarrying but it is one of the most moving things I have done, knowing I am helping others families in the healing process as they struggle to find peace in losing their little ones…just like the peace I still search for.
• I volunteered with Help-Portrait in December 2009 and worked alongside other inspiring photographers and volunteers to take photos of families who are homeless and could not afford photography.
• I continue to teach at a fulltime capacity at Valencia Community College. My students inspire me and lift my spirits every day more than I ever tell them in person.
• I continue to pursue my masters at SCAD fulltime. I managed to somehow pull off finish the remaining two courses from last quarter that I initially received an incomplete for due to the miscarriage — all while beginning a new quarter full of classes at SCAD.
• I presented two classes at Valencia’s Learning day to an amazing group of colleagues who were willing to listen to all the knowledge I had to share.
• I continue to remain reminded of the two little blessings I have — and am reminded every time I see them that miracles do happen. They remind me of the good I have brought into this world. And I am equally reminded the amazing strength Jason has been as he has tried so hard to protect me from so much hurt.

HERE’S HOW YOU CAN HELP ME.

“I’m thankful to those who said ‘no’. Because of them, I did it myself.” ~ Albert Einstein

Those who know me best know that I have a giving soul. Giving lifts my spirits. I can’t explain it. It just does. I have given a lot over the years. I’m a little surprised because this past week I attempted to give a free photo session for a silent auction for Relay for Life and for some reason it apparently received absolutely no bids. Not even a dollar. I’m utterly shocked and this has only added to the many disappointing things I have experienced lately. Yes, rarely do I accept “no” – it only drives me to do more and try harder.

So here’s how I need you to help me. I want to give. But I need your help giving too. As some of you know, Relay for Life has been a cause I have always supported, even as a student. Both of my husband’s parents passed away due to cancer. My own father has had cancer. And so many others I have come to know have somehow been affected by cancer. I have not always been in a position to give like I intend to this year. I have already given. I now need you to give too. And in return I am offering 2 FREE photo sessions this month.

One of my former students, Sakina Zorayq, is helping lead a local Relay for Life team and it is my goal to help her EXCEED the goal she has established to raise funds for Relay for Life. Whether or not you’re interested in being put in the drawing for a free photo session, it would mean the world to me if you found it in your heart to help me give.

Everyone likes “FREE” and I’ve been told so many of you like my photography – so here’s what I need you to do if you want a chance to win a free photo session with me this month.

• Go to Sakina Zorayq’s Relay for life page and donate to Relay for life. The minimum donation is $10.
• Donate a minimum of $10 dollars and email me proof of your donation to amanda [at] amandakern.com – to do this either take a screenshot of the confirmation page or proof of payment. Here’s an example of my confirmation:

• When emailing me share with me your name, contact information and the ages and number of people of who you wish to be photographed so that I can get back in touch with you if you are chosen.
• On March 12th I will arise from my coursework and randomly pick 2 winners. The names of those who have helped me give will be put in a hat and I will let my two little blessings randomly help pick 2 winners. Entries for a FREE photo session will be accepted until 3pm on March 12th, 2010.

If you win you will receive:

• A free photo session with me that will last 1-2 hours for you, your family, or someone you wish to give the session to.
• The photo session will be valid through December 31, 2010.
• You will receive all unedited and edited photos in HIGH DIGITAL RESOLUTION format. Yes, I said FREE. That means I earn NOTHING from giving.
• You will be given permission to print and share online all digitial photos for personal use.

*By participating if you win you agree that photos may be used in my portfolio.
**You must be in the immediate Orlando area or willing to travel to Orlando if you win.
***The value of a custom photo session w/high resolution photos is $650.

So take a moment to help me give. If you don’t have it in yourself to give monetarily, then help me spread the word so that I can give…not just to Relay for life – but families who would value the memories I could capture for them.  Helping me give would warm my heart and lift my spirits.

P.S. If you’re not already a fan of my photography in facebook, go join: http://www.facebook.com/amandakernphotography – this likely won’t be the last time I give this year and my fan page is a great way to stay updated!